My Healthy Love

Brittany Spears is Crying Out for Help!

November 5, 2007 on 9:24 am | In Relationship Discussions |

A relationship expert, life coach, and minister’s opinion of what’s really plaguing the Pop Princess. It is the easiest thing to speak negatively about Brittany Spears and the strange public behavior she displays, but I refuse to do so because I have nothing but compassion for her at this point in her life.  Certainly, not because of who she is, but definitely, becauseof where she is heading. If she does’t get real help soon, unfortunately, she is going to have a serious breakdown. There is hardly a day that goes by without Brittany being featured in some bizarre way in the media. I cannot blame reputable media sources like CNN, TMZ and Entertainment Tonight, because sadly  Brittany is giving them lots of unhealthy material to work with.  However, instead of sitting on the sidelines waiting for this young woman to mentally crash, let us try to understand that the underlying factor of her ongoing unhealthy behavior is really a cry for help—for real help.    

The most recent report is of the Pop Princess’ over-the-top spending habit.  I was watching CNN this weekend and headlined was Brittany’s monthly expenditures.  It was reported that Brittany earns $750,000 each month, out of which she has numerous expenses, including paying $35,000 every month to her ex-husband Kevin Federline for child support.  However, the most highlighted feature revealed that Brittany spends $102, 000 each month in attempt to keep herself entertained. 

 Spending over one hundred thousand dollars each month in search of entertainment, in my expert opinion, is a serious cry for help!  Let me break it down to a more realistic average sum that everyone can understand.  If you are earning $7,500 each month and out of that you have to pay mortgage, utilities, and other expenses, but you still spend $1,000, just to try to keep yourself entertained, something is definitely wrong.  Just like in Brittany’s case.  The difference is there are more zeros attached to her earnings, but the outcome is still the same.  Realistically, more zeros do not add more happiness.  If you are squandering such a large portion of your earnings searching for external happiness, it’s an attempt to fill an internal void.  The question is what emptiness is Brittany trying to fill? 

Here we have a young woman, who was propelled to mega stardom from a very early age, without being preparing to living real life.  She was once the public and media darling, yet the very same sources that once built her as the ideal, are the very same to display her as an out-of-control, unstable has-been.  The simple truth is the general public is fickle when it comes to “idols” and stars.  They will love them one moment, and neglect them as soon as “the next best thing” comes along.

 It’s an entire game and this is how it’s played:  First, the would-be-star’s management company selects their “new discovery.”  They groom them for stardom, while setting the publicity machines is place.  Once the star is conditioned to make their public debut, then, the major publicity hits, the general public embraces the new kid on the block, and the Paparazzi stalking begins.  The new star is given an average of a three-to- five year A-list run before they are dethroned by the next new wave of talent being introduced to the market. 

Here’s where the problem with Brittany lies.  The Pop Princess has had a pretty remarkable run and has built a wide range of loyal fans.  Regrettably, no one has taught her how to assimilate into living real life.  Therefore, she has made many reckless and unhealthy choices regarding life and love: From her impromptu one-day marriage in Las Vegas, followed by the sting of short-term unhealthy relationships, to the K-Fed affair-turned-marriage-turned divorced drama.  Added within this sad melody are the horrific experiences of losing custody of her two sons,  the notorious photos and images of her deliberately-exposed private parts all over the internet, and the pubic display of her infamous head shaving.  This led to a couple short-term stints in treatment centers, which apparently led to no long-term solutions, but instead to led to reports of her being involved in other unhealthy relationships and flings.  Brittany would benefit greatly from my national bestselling book The Band Aid Bond, where I show how to effectively “uncover the hidden causes and break the pattern of unhealthy loving.”      

What especially concerns and saddens me about Brittany’s plight is, here’s a young woman who has been unfairly used and still being used as a money-earning commodity by many. And it’s quite apparent that they will not stop until she hits rock bottom, resulting in a breakdown. Brittany is spiraling out of control—the excessive spending to find outside happiness is only a cover up, a cry for help. Keep in mind, under all of the fame, there is a scared human being, crying out for help.  Do you keep mocking her or do you extend an effective helping hand? 

The good news is, Brittany can be helped.  What she really need is a healthy sense of self, a healthy relationship with God, and healthy love in her life (both from the family who claim to care and then from so-called friends to help her stop recklessly searching for love and happiness in a series of one-night-stands), but most importantly, from herself first.  Until she gets emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually well, she will keep attracting unhealthy relationships and people into her life who want to use her, then kiss and tell about it in an open media forum.  She needs to be restored and educated to get in touch with the real Brittany and learn how to make a clear demarcation between “ Brittany the Public Persona” and “Brittany the Private Person”. There is a distinct difference between the two, and until Brittany and every other star, or would-be star, learn how to separate the two, they will always experience the lift-up then tear-down confusing emotional roller-coaster ride to and from stardom.